Small Town, Big Life

The Education of Me sans Cinderella January 29, 2009

Filed under: advice,happiness,life,perfect — handwritten @ 10:38 pm
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The words often flow easily from my fingers to my keyboard, but today I’m having a hard time figuring out what I want to say. One great thing I can share is that I’ve got a new guy in my life. It’s really fantastic to experience the simple pleasures of understanding another person the way I feel I’m beginning to understand him. The relationship is still in its infancy, but like a child, relationships arern’t made to become instantly mature with the first bite of nurishment.

Not that I’m greatly experienced in this area, but I do know from observation of great couples in my life, that you can’t expect a relationship to be without its bumps and dips, highs and mountains. From what I’ve learned from people with many more years experience in this area, people with happy and fufilled relationships, is that relationships are work. Anyone that tells you they aren’t has either not been in a relationship, or is lying to your face. 

cinderella-3Growing up, as a young girl, I was emmersed in the fairytales of Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty, Snow White and her seven dwarfs. I inadvertantly was taught to believe that I would be whisked away by a perfect Prince Charming and carry on with a perfectly wonderful life. The one fault about Cinderella and the like, is that Disney never shows you life after the whisking.  It’s not always easy. It’s not always exciting. Even during the whisking, things can get sticky, complicated and confusing. The idea of perfection is hard to outgrow, and many of us (girls) never do.

Outgrowing this notion of perfection is hard for me. True to my nature, I want things to be perfect. I want things to go the way I expect them to go, and when they don’t I am the one that is disappointed. This mindset is not a great thing for living in the imperfect world of human relationships, but over some several years now, I’ve learned that perfection is not what we should strive for in our dealings with others. What we should strive for is understanding, appreciation and respect.

If you can continually live within these three mantras, I fully believe that you can survive anything that may cause upset within a relationship. Maybe I’m insanely naive, but I’m going to keep trying it out and maybe, just maybe I’m right.